Asking for what you need is probably the most underutilized tool for people. And yet, amazing requests have been granted to people simply because they've asked for it!
Whether its money, information, support, assistance, or time, most people are afraid to ask for what they need in order to make their dreams come true.
They might be afraid of looking needy, ignorant, helpless, or even greedy. More than likely though, it is the fear of rejection that is holding them back. Even though they are afraid to hear the word no, they're already saying it to themselves by not asking!
Do you ask for what you want or are you afraid of rejection?
Consider this: Rejection is just a concept. There is really no such thing as rejection! You're not any worse off by hearing no than you were before you asked. You didn't have what you asked for before you asked and you still don't, so what did you lose?
Being rejected doesn't hold you back from anything. Only YOU hold yourself back. When you realize that there's no merit to rejection, you'll feel more comfortable asking for things. You may just need a bit of help learning how to ask for what you want.
How to Ask for What You Want
There's a specific science to asking for and getting what you want or need in life. And while I recommend you learn more by studying The Aladdin Factor, here are some quick tips to get you started:
1. Ask as if you expect to get it. Ask with a positive expectation. Ask from the place that you have already been given it. It is a done deal. Ask as if you expect to get a "yes."
2. Assume you can. Don't start with the assumption that you can't get it. If you are going to assume, assume you can get an upgrade. Assume you can get a table by the window. Assume that you can return it without a sales slip. Assume that you can get a scholarship, that you can get a raise, that you can get tickets at this late date. Don't ever assume against yourself.
3. Ask someone who can give it to you. Qualify the person. Who would I have to speak to to get...Who is authorized to make a decision about...What would have to happen for me to get...
4. Be clear and specific. In my seminars, I often ask, "Who wants more money in their life?" I'll pick someone who raised their hand and give them a quarter, asking, "Is that enough for you?" "No? Well, how would I know how much you want. How would anybody know?"
You need to ask for a specific number. Too many people are walking around wanting more of something, but not being specific enough to obtain it.
5. Ask repeatedly. One of the most important Success Principles is the commitment to not give up.
Whenever we're asking others to participate in the fulfillment of our goals, some people are going to say "no." They may have other priorities, commitments and reasons not to participate. It's no reflection on you.
Just get used to the idea that there's going to be a lot of rejection along the way to the brass ring. The key is to not give up. When someone says "No"-- you say "NEXT!"
Why?
Because when you keep on asking, even the same person again and again...they might say "yes"...
...on a different day
...when they are in a better mood
...when you have new data to present
...after you've proven your commitment to them
...when circumstances have changed
...when you've learned how to close better
...when you've established better rapport
...when they trust you more
...when you have paid your dues
...when the economy is better
...and so on.
Kids know this Success Principle better than anyone. They will ask the same person over and over again without any hesitation (can you relate!).
Getting a good perspective on rejection and learning how to ask will make a world of difference for you as you work toward your goals. Practice asking and you'll get very good at it! You'll even speed your progress by getting what you need, or improving yourself in order to get it later.
Make a list of what you need to ask for in all areas of your life, and start asking.
Remember, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE... if you dare to ask!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Childhood Psychiatric Diseases
I think the article was informative and needed. While I recognize there are abuses of systems that are fueled by greed, incompetence, lack of funding, and lack of education, there is also a lot of very good work going on to help children with a variety of mental health problems. There are also many children that do not get the help they need because of stigma, lack of adequate health insurance coverage, and lack of parity of mental health with physical health. Until we make mental illness as high a priority as cancer in research, training, funding, and access to care, there will be horror stories like the above to tell.
We need to not forget that like medicine, psychology, psychiatry, and mental health are developing fields. Therefore, what we do not do well today, we will do better tomorrow. Discussions like these, hopefully, will spur us to continue to search and prod others for better answers.
We must also remember that humans are very complex and answers for their problems will often not lie in one little box and often, not the first box you look in. It will be the combination of physical, mental, environmental, family, and spiritual answers, interventions, and changes that will help big people and little people heal from all kinds of illnesses. This is where one hand can help the other.
Here's to a better tomorrow.
Kathryn Seifert, Ph.D.
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Simple Suggestions for a Happier Holiday – Less is Often More in Making Holidays More Meaningful
• Studies suggest that Christmas, more than other holidays of the year, finds our personal spirit affected by physical and emotional stress that can wreak havoc on our interpersonal relationships.
• The expectations of warmth, joy, and happiness conveyed by the celebration--the holiday programs, songs, and cards, are often in contrast to the heartache, uncertainty, and strife in many people’s lives. Other factors are over-commercialization, financial constraints, and tension created by time demands.
• It is sometimes challenging to find hope and happiness when your circumstances are in direct contrast to a holiday atmosphere of joy and celebration, but it is an opportune time to make strides in self-evaluation and in relationship healing that will benefit you and your loved ones all year long.
• The holidays may be an advantageous time to reach out to an estranged family member or loved one and seek common ground.
• A first critical step might open the door to reconciliation and healing.
• If you feel overwhelmed with a conflict or problem, share your burden with a friend, trusted psychologist, or pastoral counselor.
• Avoid any excesses in over-eating, drinking, and over-spending. Less is often more in making a holiday more meaningful.
• Though the holidays may not be “the most wonderful time of the year,” for many of us, we can transform them into an opportunity for healthier traditions and more meaningful relationships.
• Keep expectations for the holiday structure manageable; and set realistic goals for yourself and family members.
• Pace yourself. Holidays are lengthy, so structure quality time for yourself and others.
• If you do feel nostalgic, understand that your feelings are legitimate and you are in touch with them. If you don’t feel sadness, you cannot feel warmth; but you are capable of processing feelings and moving forward with your life.
• Do something very simple for someone else. Though we know that we feel better when giving, research has proven that thinking of others creates happiness in ourselves.
• During the holidays, enjoy activities that are free from stress, such as a walk in the woods, or tea with a friend.
• Find an exercise that works for you and your schedule and make it a priority. Exercise improves your mind and your body. People who suffer from seasonal affective disorder, especially, can benefit from more hours in the sunlight and walks out of doors.
• Celebrate the holidays in a new and meaningful way. Donate to a charity or draw names within a family to decrease the expense and stress of gift buying.
• Spend time with supportive and caring people. Carefully make choices, rather than attending every holiday event.
• Save time for yourself and your loved ones! Recharge your batteries and let others share in the responsibilities and rewards of a meaningful holiday season.
With best wishes for a wonderful holiday from the Board and Staff of the Mental Health Association in Talbot County
• The expectations of warmth, joy, and happiness conveyed by the celebration--the holiday programs, songs, and cards, are often in contrast to the heartache, uncertainty, and strife in many people’s lives. Other factors are over-commercialization, financial constraints, and tension created by time demands.
• It is sometimes challenging to find hope and happiness when your circumstances are in direct contrast to a holiday atmosphere of joy and celebration, but it is an opportune time to make strides in self-evaluation and in relationship healing that will benefit you and your loved ones all year long.
• The holidays may be an advantageous time to reach out to an estranged family member or loved one and seek common ground.
• A first critical step might open the door to reconciliation and healing.
• If you feel overwhelmed with a conflict or problem, share your burden with a friend, trusted psychologist, or pastoral counselor.
• Avoid any excesses in over-eating, drinking, and over-spending. Less is often more in making a holiday more meaningful.
• Though the holidays may not be “the most wonderful time of the year,” for many of us, we can transform them into an opportunity for healthier traditions and more meaningful relationships.
• Keep expectations for the holiday structure manageable; and set realistic goals for yourself and family members.
• Pace yourself. Holidays are lengthy, so structure quality time for yourself and others.
• If you do feel nostalgic, understand that your feelings are legitimate and you are in touch with them. If you don’t feel sadness, you cannot feel warmth; but you are capable of processing feelings and moving forward with your life.
• Do something very simple for someone else. Though we know that we feel better when giving, research has proven that thinking of others creates happiness in ourselves.
• During the holidays, enjoy activities that are free from stress, such as a walk in the woods, or tea with a friend.
• Find an exercise that works for you and your schedule and make it a priority. Exercise improves your mind and your body. People who suffer from seasonal affective disorder, especially, can benefit from more hours in the sunlight and walks out of doors.
• Celebrate the holidays in a new and meaningful way. Donate to a charity or draw names within a family to decrease the expense and stress of gift buying.
• Spend time with supportive and caring people. Carefully make choices, rather than attending every holiday event.
• Save time for yourself and your loved ones! Recharge your batteries and let others share in the responsibilities and rewards of a meaningful holiday season.
With best wishes for a wonderful holiday from the Board and Staff of the Mental Health Association in Talbot County
Monday, December 21, 2009
Brief Stress Relief Tips For the Demanding Lifestyle
Brief Stress Relief Tips For the Demanding Lifestyle
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Clade_Johnson]Clade Johnson
Good health and long life does not have to be an elusive ideal when you apply these easy to understand stress relief tips. Working towards success and achieving our goals can be very stressful. Leading a demanding lifestyle can often cause the body more harm than it should.
Whether you work in a very busy environment or as a full-time mom with very active kids, being overly anxious on a daily basis can take a heavy toll on your body. Worrying about the little things or worse, about life-altering decisions can weaken you, making you more susceptible to various diseases.
Simple Guide to Relieving Stress
When you find yourself in a difficult bind, one common invaluable tip that can help you in a distressing situation is to stand back, take a deep breath and exhale slowly. This tip will help your body relax by slowing it down and preventing your anxieties from kicking into high gear.
Remember, no one is exempted from stress and anxiety. It is quite normal to panic and lose one's cool every now and then especially when you find yourself in an unfamiliar territory. Therefore, another important stress relief tip is to acquaint yourself with the people that you will be dealing with. Being prepared of what to expect can strengthen your tolerance of nerve-racking circumstances.
But often the burden can be too much for one person. Another stress relief tip is to find a trusted friend or family member who can help you go through the problematic condition. Talking about what is bothering you can lessen the anxiety and aid you in taking control.
Another stress relieving tip is to indulge yourself once in a while with any activity that is just meant for you to enjoy yourself. Taking yourself out of the environment causing you needless stress can help you recharge mentally, physically, and emotionally. Ways of doing this could be playing a sport, tinkering with a hobby, going to a picnic, a vacation, or just spending quality time with friends and family.
One other thing to keep in mind is to always, always, EAT right! Have lots of fruits and veggies in your daily diet. Combined with proper and regular exercise, you are sure to keep away from debilitating stress.
You can learn more about Clade's [http://15yearmortgagerates.org/]15_Year Mortgage Rates and new [http://pontoonboatparts.org/]Pontoon Boat Parts by visiting his websites.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Brief-Stress-Relief-Tips-For-the-Demanding-Lifestyle&id=3458810] Brief Stress Relief Tips For the Demanding Lifestyle
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Clade_Johnson]Clade Johnson
Good health and long life does not have to be an elusive ideal when you apply these easy to understand stress relief tips. Working towards success and achieving our goals can be very stressful. Leading a demanding lifestyle can often cause the body more harm than it should.
Whether you work in a very busy environment or as a full-time mom with very active kids, being overly anxious on a daily basis can take a heavy toll on your body. Worrying about the little things or worse, about life-altering decisions can weaken you, making you more susceptible to various diseases.
Simple Guide to Relieving Stress
When you find yourself in a difficult bind, one common invaluable tip that can help you in a distressing situation is to stand back, take a deep breath and exhale slowly. This tip will help your body relax by slowing it down and preventing your anxieties from kicking into high gear.
Remember, no one is exempted from stress and anxiety. It is quite normal to panic and lose one's cool every now and then especially when you find yourself in an unfamiliar territory. Therefore, another important stress relief tip is to acquaint yourself with the people that you will be dealing with. Being prepared of what to expect can strengthen your tolerance of nerve-racking circumstances.
But often the burden can be too much for one person. Another stress relief tip is to find a trusted friend or family member who can help you go through the problematic condition. Talking about what is bothering you can lessen the anxiety and aid you in taking control.
Another stress relieving tip is to indulge yourself once in a while with any activity that is just meant for you to enjoy yourself. Taking yourself out of the environment causing you needless stress can help you recharge mentally, physically, and emotionally. Ways of doing this could be playing a sport, tinkering with a hobby, going to a picnic, a vacation, or just spending quality time with friends and family.
One other thing to keep in mind is to always, always, EAT right! Have lots of fruits and veggies in your daily diet. Combined with proper and regular exercise, you are sure to keep away from debilitating stress.
You can learn more about Clade's [http://15yearmortgagerates.org/]15_Year Mortgage Rates and new [http://pontoonboatparts.org/]Pontoon Boat Parts by visiting his websites.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Brief-Stress-Relief-Tips-For-the-Demanding-Lifestyle&id=3458810] Brief Stress Relief Tips For the Demanding Lifestyle
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Jason's Network
Lot's of interesting people and information at Jason's Network
It is a network about peace, spirituality, health, wellness, success, and much more. Take a look. Consider joining. It's free
Dr. kathy
It is a network about peace, spirituality, health, wellness, success, and much more. Take a look. Consider joining. It's free
Dr. kathy
Thursday, December 10, 2009
The Yin and Yang of Beating Holiday Stress
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Donna_Gallers]Donna Gallers
As we approach the Winter Solstice (the shortest day of the year), many of us also observe holidays that celebrate light in the midst of darkness, warmth coming in from the cold, and miracles taking place where they seemed impossible.
The public face of this season is one of celebration, parties, gift-giving, and endless good cheer. That's all good and much of it sincere, but many of us also experience this as an extremely stressful period, with added burdens on our time, financial situations, emotions, and energy. The news of the world remains challenging, the commercialization intense, and we may wonder how we can truly feel joyful amidst all these conflicting energies.
This is a time to remember, look for, and hold out for the light wherever you can find it -- be it outside in the world or inside yourself. Darkness and light are aspects of yin and yang, the opposing and at the same time interconnected forces of the natural world. Each is found within the other, and each arises or gives way to the other, as the Solstice gives way to the longer and lighter days that follow.
For some of us the light, or lightness at this time of year can be found in the company of people we treasure; for others perhaps a walk in nature, or the bright lights of a city night, make our heart glisten. It's okay to acknowledge the moments of darkness, fear, anger, loneliness, disillusionment, etc., as they allow us to also transform and welcome the complementary experiences of exuberance, joy, laughter, relaxation, and inner peace. Know who you are and embrace your version, or vision, of light, warmth and miracles. This will help carry you through the stresses of the holidays and throughout the year(s) ahead.
Donna Gallers, LMT, CHHP, AADP is a licensed massage therapist, holistic health/nutrition counselor, and qigong teacher based in New York City. Her bodywork practice centers on Clinical and Process Acupressure, integrative forms of bodywork that promote better health and renewed energy by involving the client in his or her own healing process. She takes a similarly integrative approach to nutrition and health counseling. http://www.donnagallers.com http://www.dgallers.vpweb.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Donna_Gallers http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Yin-and-Yang-of-Beating-Holiday-Stress&id=3398363
As we approach the Winter Solstice (the shortest day of the year), many of us also observe holidays that celebrate light in the midst of darkness, warmth coming in from the cold, and miracles taking place where they seemed impossible.
The public face of this season is one of celebration, parties, gift-giving, and endless good cheer. That's all good and much of it sincere, but many of us also experience this as an extremely stressful period, with added burdens on our time, financial situations, emotions, and energy. The news of the world remains challenging, the commercialization intense, and we may wonder how we can truly feel joyful amidst all these conflicting energies.
This is a time to remember, look for, and hold out for the light wherever you can find it -- be it outside in the world or inside yourself. Darkness and light are aspects of yin and yang, the opposing and at the same time interconnected forces of the natural world. Each is found within the other, and each arises or gives way to the other, as the Solstice gives way to the longer and lighter days that follow.
For some of us the light, or lightness at this time of year can be found in the company of people we treasure; for others perhaps a walk in nature, or the bright lights of a city night, make our heart glisten. It's okay to acknowledge the moments of darkness, fear, anger, loneliness, disillusionment, etc., as they allow us to also transform and welcome the complementary experiences of exuberance, joy, laughter, relaxation, and inner peace. Know who you are and embrace your version, or vision, of light, warmth and miracles. This will help carry you through the stresses of the holidays and throughout the year(s) ahead.
Donna Gallers, LMT, CHHP, AADP is a licensed massage therapist, holistic health/nutrition counselor, and qigong teacher based in New York City. Her bodywork practice centers on Clinical and Process Acupressure, integrative forms of bodywork that promote better health and renewed energy by involving the client in his or her own healing process. She takes a similarly integrative approach to nutrition and health counseling. http://www.donnagallers.com http://www.dgallers.vpweb.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Donna_Gallers http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Yin-and-Yang-of-Beating-Holiday-Stress&id=3398363
The Stress Institute
Some very good information on stress management on the Stress Institute website
Keeping Stress Down Over the Holidays
we all know the Holidays can be stressful. here are some ideas to try to keep it manageable.
1. make your expectations of the holidays reasonable. When you feel disappointed, remind yourself of a happy holiday memory or event.
2. You do not have to have the best gift ever and wow everyone on your list. Make gift choices thoughtful rather than expensive. You will be glad you did when the season is over.
3. Pace yourself. Be sure to take relaxing breaks when things are hectic. stop and listen to some Christmas music in the mall while you shop. Have a cup of tea or coffee and enjoy the sights and sounds.
4. Give something to someone less fortunate than you and be grateful for the wonderful friends and family you have. One friend or family member is all you need to be grateful. reach out to someone this Christmas.
5. Make time for yourself. Do something fun. Take time to be quiet.
6. Eat well, at least some of the time. Pace yourself with sweets.
7. Listen to a relaxation CD or download. There are many on Amazon and itunes.
8. Read a book or magazine or surf the net for interesting articles.
9. smile and Laugh. Tell a joke. Forward a joke through email. make someone else laugh.
10. remember that when things are at their worse, they will get better in time.
11. talk to someone about your feelings if you feel sad. get social support from someone else or give social support to someone.
12. Happy Holidays. Enjoy.
1. make your expectations of the holidays reasonable. When you feel disappointed, remind yourself of a happy holiday memory or event.
2. You do not have to have the best gift ever and wow everyone on your list. Make gift choices thoughtful rather than expensive. You will be glad you did when the season is over.
3. Pace yourself. Be sure to take relaxing breaks when things are hectic. stop and listen to some Christmas music in the mall while you shop. Have a cup of tea or coffee and enjoy the sights and sounds.
4. Give something to someone less fortunate than you and be grateful for the wonderful friends and family you have. One friend or family member is all you need to be grateful. reach out to someone this Christmas.
5. Make time for yourself. Do something fun. Take time to be quiet.
6. Eat well, at least some of the time. Pace yourself with sweets.
7. Listen to a relaxation CD or download. There are many on Amazon and itunes.
8. Read a book or magazine or surf the net for interesting articles.
9. smile and Laugh. Tell a joke. Forward a joke through email. make someone else laugh.
10. remember that when things are at their worse, they will get better in time.
11. talk to someone about your feelings if you feel sad. get social support from someone else or give social support to someone.
12. Happy Holidays. Enjoy.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
the Wii fit
I have tried the new Wii fit to try to stay healthier and I love it. It has Yoga, aerobics, games, focus, and balance. I think it is going to keep me engaged. My grand daughter and I both have used it so far. It will also measure your weight and BMI, as well as balance and chart your progress. It will give you the number of calories burned. You can compete against yourself, if you are competitive, which I am I am liking it.
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